my touching autobiography

Last week was my birthday,
I woke up in the morning, though I was expecting to be woken up at midnight, got ready and was surprised to see my wife not wishing me, my kids went to school in their usual manner as if it was a usual day, even my parents did not wish me...I went to office, frustrated, none of my employees wished me either but I was delighted when my beautiful secretary cam in my cabin and wished me "happy happy birthday boss" I was in tears when I asked her if she would come for a party, she agreed and we had a nice lunch at a posh restaurant... she asked me if I would like to come to her apartment, I obviously agreed. On reaching her apartment she told me she had to get ready and would be back in 5 minutes to which I agreed and got myself ready for the feast. A few minutes later light was turned on and many screamed "surprise" , I was indeed totally Surprised to find my wife, kids, parents, employees and secretary standing at the door with a cake, and I was sitting on the sofa, naked.
whatever happened next didn't surprise me, I got divorced!