Wednesday, 30 November 2011
Monday, 28 November 2011
Sunday, 27 November 2011
3 Reasons 2 Give Exam
1. you can spend 3 hours in self meditation.
2. you can complete your sleep.
3. you can see your teachers being bored who usually bore you
Saturday, 26 November 2011
the cute loveletter!
Girlfriend: i kiss every stamp pasted on your letter addressed to me....because i know your lips would have touched it before while applying it!
Boyfriend: uhh!! actually i affix the stamps after rubbing them with my dog's nose!
Boyfriend: uhh!! actually i affix the stamps after rubbing them with my dog's nose!
Monday, 21 November 2011
can u plz help me
Me: “How can I help you today, ma’am?”
Client: “Is e-mail internet”?
Me: “I beg your pardon?”
Client: “Is e-mail on the internet? I have no internet, can I still read my e-mail?”
Me: “Well yes, you must be able to get online to view your e-mail.”
Client: “Oh, dear. I can’t see my e-mail.”
Me: “Well, let’s see. Can you open up Internet Explorer for me and tell me what you see?”
Client: “Open what?”
Me: “Your browser, can you open up your browser?”
Client: “My…my…?”
Me: “What you click on when you want to browse the internet?”
Client: “I don’t use anything, I just turn my computer on, and it’s there.”
Me: “Okay. Do you see the little blue ‘e’ icon on your desktop?”
Client: “You mean I have to start writing letters again?”
Me: “I’m…what, I’m sorry?”
Client: “I don’t have any pens at my desk. I just want my e-mail again.”
Me: “No, ma’am, your desktop, on your computer screen. Can you click on the little blue ‘e’ on your computer screen for me?”
Client: “Oh, this is too much work. I’m too upset. Just send me my e-mail. Can’t you send me my e-mail?”
Me: “We…okay, ma’am. Can you tell me what color the lights are on your router right now?”
Client: “My what?”
Me: “The little box with green or possibly a couple of red lights on it right now - it’s most likely near your computer?”
Client: “Lights and boxes, boxes and lights, just get my e-mail for me.
Me: “My test is showing that you should be able to get online right now. Can you tell me what you’re seeing on your computer screen?”
Client: “It’s been the same thing for the last two hours.”
Me: “An error message?”
Client: “No, just stars. It’s black and moving stars.”
Me: “…Do you see your mouse next to your keyboard?”
Client: “Yes.”
Me: “Move it for me.”
Client: “Move it?”
Me: “Yes. Move it.”
Client: “My e-mail!”
Client: “Is e-mail internet”?
Me: “I beg your pardon?”
Client: “Is e-mail on the internet? I have no internet, can I still read my e-mail?”
Me: “Well yes, you must be able to get online to view your e-mail.”
Client: “Oh, dear. I can’t see my e-mail.”
Me: “Well, let’s see. Can you open up Internet Explorer for me and tell me what you see?”
Client: “Open what?”
Me: “Your browser, can you open up your browser?”
Client: “My…my…?”
Me: “What you click on when you want to browse the internet?”
Client: “I don’t use anything, I just turn my computer on, and it’s there.”
Me: “Okay. Do you see the little blue ‘e’ icon on your desktop?”
Client: “You mean I have to start writing letters again?”
Me: “I’m…what, I’m sorry?”
Client: “I don’t have any pens at my desk. I just want my e-mail again.”
Me: “No, ma’am, your desktop, on your computer screen. Can you click on the little blue ‘e’ on your computer screen for me?”
Client: “Oh, this is too much work. I’m too upset. Just send me my e-mail. Can’t you send me my e-mail?”
Me: “We…okay, ma’am. Can you tell me what color the lights are on your router right now?”
Client: “My what?”
Me: “The little box with green or possibly a couple of red lights on it right now - it’s most likely near your computer?”
Client: “Lights and boxes, boxes and lights, just get my e-mail for me.
Me: “My test is showing that you should be able to get online right now. Can you tell me what you’re seeing on your computer screen?”
Client: “It’s been the same thing for the last two hours.”
Me: “An error message?”
Client: “No, just stars. It’s black and moving stars.”
Me: “…Do you see your mouse next to your keyboard?”
Client: “Yes.”
Me: “Move it for me.”
Client: “Move it?”
Me: “Yes. Move it.”
Client: “My e-mail!”
Sunday, 20 November 2011
Friday, 18 November 2011
santa the scientist
A man jumped into the river and never came back.
Another man jumped, he also did not return.
Santa's conclusion: Man is soluble in water...!!
by:kunal
Thursday, 17 November 2011
examinations!!
six things boys do in examination hall!
1> counting number of girls
2> sighting the lady supervisor
3> counting the number of windows and doors
4> seeing the brand name of pen
5> feelings for wasting the last night without studying
6> think to study well atleast for next exam
six things girls do in examination hall
(whether they know or don't know!)
1> write
2> write
3> write
4> write
5> write
6> write
god only knows what they write!!
by:ashish
1> counting number of girls
2> sighting the lady supervisor
3> counting the number of windows and doors
4> seeing the brand name of pen
5> feelings for wasting the last night without studying
6> think to study well atleast for next exam
six things girls do in examination hall
(whether they know or don't know!)
1> write
2> write
3> write
4> write
5> write
6> write
god only knows what they write!!
by:ashish
video game loco
Jack : I love Playing video game with my younger brother.
Friend: Why only your brother?
Jack: I always beat him.......................... when I lose.
by:kunal
Wednesday, 16 November 2011
drunk men ask for lift
Three men were drunk, they stopped a taxi for a lift,
The taxi driver figured that they were drunk,he just switched on the engine & switched it off & told them, we have arrived.
The 1st guy gave him money,
2nd guy said thanks but the
3rd guy slapped him.
The taxi driver was stunned because he was hoping that none of them must have realized that the car didn't move an inch.
so he asked,what was that for?
Guy Replied, control your speed next time Dude,you almost killed us...
by:kunal
Tuesday, 15 November 2011
Indian newspaper headlines in 2060
Indian newspaper headlines in 2060:
Kasab dies at 70 in jail of high cholesterol due to too much biryani.
Golmaal part 27 is released,
Tusshar Kapoor is still unable to speak or act.
Sharad Pawar owns half the world.
Facebook is declared a country.... ...
Raja's son is arrested for 16G scam.
Girl in Delhi travels 50 feet safely.
"Lakshadeep Cats" to be the 63rd team to join IPL.
by:kunal
financial management
A beggar found rs 100.
He went to 5 star hotel for dinner.
Had his delicious feast and bill amount was rs 3000.
With his total amount not worth paying the tip...Manager handed him to police.
He gave rs 100. to police and was set free.
Its called FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT without MBA.
by: kunal
He went to 5 star hotel for dinner.
Had his delicious feast and bill amount was rs 3000.
With his total amount not worth paying the tip...Manager handed him to police.
He gave rs 100. to police and was set free.
Its called FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT without MBA.
by: kunal
Monday, 14 November 2011
Sunday, 13 November 2011
can't get funnier
Teacher: give me one example of a Coincident?
Santa: my mother and father, both have the same date as marriage anniversary..!
Santa: my mother and father, both have the same date as marriage anniversary..!
Saturday, 12 November 2011
japanese tourist!
A Japanese came to India. He took a AUTO to go to the airport.
On the way a HONDA overtakes,
Japanese: HONDA made in JAPAN very fast.....
Next a TOYOTA overtakes, he said TOYOTA made in JAPAN, very fast.
Airport came he asked how much?
Driver: 8000Rs
Japanese: why so expensive?
Driver: METER made in INDIA very fast...
On the way a HONDA overtakes,
Japanese: HONDA made in JAPAN very fast.....
Next a TOYOTA overtakes, he said TOYOTA made in JAPAN, very fast.
Airport came he asked how much?
Driver: 8000Rs
Japanese: why so expensive?
Driver: METER made in INDIA very fast...
Thursday, 10 November 2011
Wednesday, 9 November 2011
the intelligent girl!
Boy: How many apples can you eat in empty stomach?
Girl: I can eat 6 apples........
Boy: you can eat only 1 apple in empty stomach because when you eat the 2nd apple that's not in empty stomach........
Girl: wow super joke...... I'll tell my friend.
next day...
Girl to Other Girl: How many apple can you eat in empty stomach?
Other Girl: I can eat 10.
Girl: oh no, If you would have told 6 apples I could have shared a very nice joke with you !
by: parth
Tuesday, 8 November 2011
Saturday, 5 November 2011
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